Seven Royal Laws of Courtship: Chapter 2

Seven Royal Laws of Courtship
Chapter 2

Tenants of the Second Royal Law of Courtship

“By the grace of Almighty God, I will arrive a the marriage altar morally pure.

1. Make a vow of chastity to the Lord (Deuteronomy 23:21).
2. Realize the battleground for purity is fought in the mind. Work at developing a pure mind (2 Timothy 2:22 & 1 John 3:2-3).

• Guard your eye gates!
  • Psalm 101:3
  • Job 31:1
• “How do I deal with evil thoughts?”
  • Our wonderful Creator has equipped us with minds that cannot think on more than one thing at a time. Choose to meditate on “whatsoever things are pure.”
    • Philippians 4:8
    • 2 Corinthians 10:5
    • Psalm 199:11
    • Psalm 1:2
• Never make excuses for lusting after the opposite gender. Doing so is a sin.
  • James 1:15
  • Proverbs 6:23-25
  • Matthew 5:28
  • 1 John 2:15-16

3. Institute a personal “no-touch rule” and enforce it.

• 2 Corinthians 7:1-2
• 1 Corinthians 7:1-2
• 1 Thessalonians 4:3-7
• Ecclesiastes 3:1 & 5
• Hebrews 13:4

4. Understand the importance of “pacing” a relationship. This is essential in helping you arrive at the altar pure and chaste.

• In order to properly pace a relationship you need to answer these questions:
  • What is the safest age a serious relationship should start?
  • What would be the best time marriage should be considered?
  • At what pace should a relationship move so that it will peak in intensity no earlier than the proper timing for marriage?
• Please consider the following suggestions . . .
  • Spend your high school years serving the Lord, making friendships and preparing yourself for your future.
  • Do not get into a serious boy-girl relationship during your high school years. When you graduate from high school, you should have all of your options open. There will be an enormous difference between how you look at lief on the day you turn sixteen years of age and how you view it one the day your turn twenty-one. Your view of yourself, of others, of god and of what is truly important will have gone through a dramatic change. I personally believe that most young people would be wise to wait until the end of this six-year period before pursuing a serious relationship.
  • Most romantic relationships peak in intensity within a two-year period. What I mean by that is, after two years, you have exhausted every level that a proper relationship can rightly achieve and are ready to be married! If this is rue, why start a serious relationship five years before your should be married?
• If you do not properly pace your relationship, you will peak before you should and one of the following will happen:
  • You will get married before you should.
  • You will break up with that person out of frustration.
  • You will continue forward into areas intended to be developed after marriage.

6. Have a game plan.

• Age 13-18: “I'm not going to get caught up in riding the romance roller coaster. God has someone He is preparing for me, and during these years I will prepare for that special one.”
• Age 18 and beyond: “The time has come for me to prayerfully consider other dedicated Christian young people as a possible partner for life. I will rely heavily upon the counsel of my parents and the Holy Spirit's leading. I refuse to get in too big of a hurry. I will begin preparing to accomplish what God has directed me to do. When God leads me to this one, I will pray for great wisdom in pacing our relationship so that we both enjoy each step as God turns our friendship into divine love.”

The Anatomy of a Seduction

1. Don't stay simple (Proverbs 7:7)

• Proverbs 4:5-8
• Proverbs 6:20-24
• Proverbs 2:10-16

2. Avoid places of temptation.

• Proverbs 7:7-8
• Proverbs 27:12

3. Avoid hours of temptation.

• Proverbs 7:9

4. Avoid those who dress immodestly.

• Proverbs 7:10

5. Avoid people of low moral character.

• Proverbs 7:10-12

6. Avoid people who cannot keep their hands to themselves.

• Proverbs 7:13

7. Avoid people who wear a cloak of spirituality.

• Proverbs 7:13-14
• Proverbs 2:11-17

8. Avoid those who talk suggestively or use flattery and fair speech to get what they want.

• Proverbs 7:15-21

9. Avoid people who are always trying to get you alone.

• Proverbs 7:19-20

10. Read often the consequences of fornication and adultery.

• Proverbs 7:22-27
• Proverbs 2:16-19
• Proverbs 5:1-5
• Proverbs 5:20-23
• Proverbs 6:23-33